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44. De-clutter Your Life: Learn How to Say NO + Let Go! with Samantha Joy

Updated: Dec 2, 2020

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Where do you find your identity?

So many of us struggle with losing our true selves within the clutter of life.

In today's episode we'll be hearing from Identity Coach and Best-Selling Author, Samantha Joy!

We'll be answering questions like:

  • What is the "Less Effect"?

  • How can I implement minimalism into my physical, social, and habitual environments?

  • How can I practice saying "no"?

  • Why is changing my environment important?

  • What role does minimalism play in a healthy relationship with social media?

"What is your message that you live by?"

Minimalism: stripping away the things that don't serve us to find ourselves and our true identity and then being intentional about what we fill those spaces with.

Don't suffocate who you are with things, people, or routines that take away from your true identity. When most people think of minimalism, they think of it in regards to tangible clutter. However, minimalism can be extended way beyond that. Samantha likes to make three environmental categories: physical, social, and habitual.

Physical refers to the things we have. It could be clothing, books, any physical objects that you own. Social refers to the people we spend time and interact with. People can have a big impact on who we present ourselves as. They can make a positive impact on our lives or they can drag us down. It's important to be discerning in who you choose to spend your time with. Habitual refers to our routines and the things we our consistently doing. Are there people you are always trying to please? Are you living for yourself or for someone else? Does your daily routine make your day easier or harder? We have to note which of our consistent behaviors are adding to or taking away from our lives.

"There are a lot of things you have to work through to be okay with being by yourself."

How do you feel when you're completely alone? No phone. No music. Nothing. Being alone with our thoughts can be very unsettling, uncomfortable, and sometimes scary. Who are you when you're by yourself with only the company of your own mind? You might not be able to answer that question.

We often use distractions to suppress memories and thoughts that we don't want to come up. So when you strip away everything you use to keep those unwanted thoughts away (people, work, music, social media), they come about and we are completely unprepared to deal with them. In order to feel okay being alone with your mind, you need to confront those things that you are trying so hard to suppress.

Only once you're at peace with your mind will you be at peace with your life.

"Things can change because we can change."

Humans are not complacent beings. We grow and we change. One of the best ways to do so is learning how to say "no." Start showing up for yourself and your needs. If we don't treat our time as sacred then who will? By not constantly saying yes when you want to say no, you'll start recognizing your own worth. When you start recognizing your worth, others with start recognizing that same worth within you. Once we are able to change, we start seeing our perspectives change.

Journaling homework!

Grab a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle. Label the left side "Less" and the right side "More."

First, write down all the things you want less of (literally anything: things, people, tasks, work, etc.).

Then go to the right side and write down everything you want more of. Then go back to the left side and with each thing you wrote down, write what it would take to get less of it.

Open up the possibilities of getting rid of these things and visualize the space you will have once you do.

Here are some more thought provoking journaling topics!:

  1. What were you passionate about as a child?

  2. When was the last time you felt the most YOU? Like forgot to eat, drink, go to the bathroom, fully present, fully-expressed you?

  3. What is the story that has been holding you back? Does this story still apply to you?


Samantha Joy is an Identity Coach to aspiring entrepreneurs and influencers. Her coaching approach focuses on the concept of minimalism, enabling others to shift their identity to their most authentic self by clearing out aspects of their life rooted in an old story.

The result is enhanced mental clarity, an improved sense of self, and the ability to design an environment that attracts abundance and fulfillment.

Connect on IG @samantha_joy__

And check out her website!


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